easter, tangents, pictures, ect.

I was going through some of my blog posts, and I was like, "Dang, I used to write a ton!" These days, I just don't. I just post a ton of pictures. Which, I suppose is better than nothng. But I always have things to say. 

Easter was pretty fun. I had to speak in relief society, which in actuality wasn't that much fun. I'm not a good speaker in front of people. I get nervous really easily and I lose my train of thought, a lot. I had this whole lesson planned, but when I started going, I couldn't stop and get back on track. For some stupid reason, I ended a little early, even thought I had TONS of other stuff I was supposed to say. I can't even remember anything that came out of my mouth, or if anything even made sense. I came home and when Wade asked me how my lesson went, I just cried. I wanted it to go so well, and I didn't feel satisfied with it. He told me that Heavenly Father was happy with my efforts in trying and that he thought I went well...which initially made me feel better for the rest of the day. When I'm at school and have to present my lesson plans to the class or in front of my instructors, I freeze up like I did in church sometimes. I think a lot of it has to do with not ever feeling listened to as a teenager. Sure, I had friends and family who would talk to me and ask me how I was doing, but I never really felt like I had someone who really cared about what I had to say..which leads me to just say things, knowing that whatever I'm saying isn't really being listened to? I've just been thinking about that a lot, the skill of being an active listener is hard to come by. Someone who really listens and cares about what you have to say. Someone who not only listens to your story, but asks questions and genuinely wants to know how you're feeling about something. Just a tangent, but an honest one. Maybe better luck next time with the talk.. Sometimes I feel like there IS a lot expected out of me in this ward, or I appear more grown up than I really am, or something?? I have two callings that I feel I am not qualified for, how many 21 year olds do you know that have the callings of Compassionate Service and Assistant Camp Director. Don't you have to at least have 5 kids for callings like that? I really have loved being Compassionate Service though, I've gotten to know a lot of people in the ward and  I feel that is where my comfort level is.  Sorry another tangent. I sounds really whiny, sorry about it. Just saying though.

On Easter, We went to my mama's house and ryan and jord were there along with dani and ty & ellie. We had a yummy dinner and then we just hung out, played catch and basketball outside. Wader bought me some cute coral colored skinny's and we bought him a new summer outfit. We found out little Ellie Bellie loves silly string. And that Wade thinks he's Mary Poppins on the Tandem bike. Silly. 

Yesterday was just plain crazy. I went to work and then when I got off at the preschool, I had to go work at Apple til 9, and then at 9:30 I had a volleyball game. At said game, I went up to block a ball and somehow jolted my lower back way out of wack. I tried to play the rest of the game but was seriously struggling! It hurt so bad and I couldn't stand up straight. Basically, we went and sat in the hot tub afterwards with Katee and Zach and I thought that would help, but it only hurt worse. When we came home around 11, I went to bed and ask me if I slept well at all. So, I woke up really early and called work and told them I was going to the Chiropractor because I couldn't even walk. Got to the chiropractor somehow, and bawled my way through the adjustment. Have to go back Friday. Joyous. I came home from work today, and about wanted to die.I stuck it out and I went to a meeting for girls camp. Came home, crawled into bed and I just barely woke up. It's 9:00 P.M. This is going to be an awesome night. :) It's fine though, I have four sessions of photo editing to get me through the night. I'm determined to finish tonight. I mean, really what else am I going to do? Sneak Peaks tomorrow. :) 

Anyways, have a good week!

love, kar