![..karly from [kar plus[+] wade]](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AEn0k_tHjNMsJVGiPuhbbXOM4peGr0syNQR-E5Tc6zE6FGyKHcvUoA0T_44YmtkZ5xZlN03QGjzxzvE5X304NhBlqoDDV031wNeY8mi3b5Dp8JpMM75ygfHfSWNnTZM6UYL3IqLj2qPf55Z8a-Dx_HIUZg=s0-d)
And not my job as a teacher.
as a mom.
A couple of reasons here.
I was feeling mom guilt because parent teacher conferences went until 7:30 last night. Ivy goes to bed at 8:30, so I got to see her for an hour last night. Then when I dropped her off at the babysitters this morning, she cried and cried and CRIED..
Then one of my students moved this morning, and his mom said it was because he needed to go to "a safe place." That literally broke my heart.
Wade and I took Ivy to the park today. She had been a little fussy and irritable at home and I had a photoshoot at the park this afternoon {why I scheduled a photoshoot this week, I don't even know..}, so we took her along to get out of the house. She threw a huge tantrum when I tried to put her in her stroller. She has been passing out when she cries too hard...and it's so scary! I hate it so much! Luckily she caught her breath and she was fine, but then she fell down the slide and cried some more..and then kept saying.."wing, wing!" (swing). So we went over to the swings, and she started screaming?
And today, I wasn't emotionally prepared for it. I just wasn't.
And I broke down in the middle of the park.
And as I was crying, with my hands covering my face,
I told Wade, "I can't do it all!"
Because, I can't do it all.
And that's hard for me, because I like to think I can.
And I don't like help.
{It's one of my major struggles}
And that was the story of the day I wanted to quit being a mom.
{I'm over that by now, and tomorrow is a new day!}
Hmmph.
3 comments:
Oh karly, I think EVERY mom goes through struggles and breaking points... Completely normal and a part of parenthood ;) I've had plenty myself :) and it sounds like miss ivy is entering the terrible 2s (something we see too often here lol). And I knew a couple parents who had little ones who held their breath till passing out... One actually squirted their face with water to get thwir minds off it and it worked for them lol. No worries girl, u are doing awesome!! :)
Don't worry about Ivy passing out. (At least thats what our doctor told us about our little guy) He is almost three and still does it occasionally. The best thing you can do is just make sure you teach her to sit down every time she cries so she doesn't fall from a standing position. Be there to catch her and she will grow out of it. My nephew did that too for a long time. He is eight now and he doesn't do it anymore but he did it until he was like five. But he still sits down to cry. :) Hang in there momma! You can do it!
I've had days like that before too and I'm not even a working mom! I have a hard time asking for help too (my calling helps me with that a bit) but I like to think I can do it all still. I can't. Hang in there! Know you're not alone and you have lots of family and friends that love you! :)
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